If people treated their houses...

I came up with this idea yesterday for some reason. Probably because I'm weird. Enjoy!

If people treated their houses like they do their web sites...

• The front lawn contains an obnoxious yellow and purple sign with ridiculously large font that reads, "Welcome to our house. We hope you like your visit. Please browse around and sign the guestbook next to the front door. Come back and visit soon."
  
• The mailbox has wings on it and would rotate 24/7.
  
• You are forced to stand on the front porch and watch a short, flashy presentation announcing whose house you're entering. Once the presentation is done the front door appears.
  
• There is a turnstile at the front door that counts the number of people entering the house. A sign next to the front door reads, "You are visitor number 63 since October 10, 1998"
  
• The carpet is bright blue and tiled with pictures of whatever your favorite hobby is. Or, your carpet is jet black and all your furniture is red and yellow.
  
• Anything attached to the walls inside your house including picture frames, lighting, and window treatments would move constantly.
  
• Everything in your house would be contained in one single room that is 150 feet long and 18 feet wide.
  
• Strobe lights hang from your ceiling in the amount of 1 for every 25 square feet of space.
  
• If it is a Christian household, there are brochures all over the house telling each visitor they're going to hell.
  
• A musak version of "Eye of the Tiger" is played from an old cassette player in the corner that you can't shut off.
  
• One wall is filled with every picture the family owns. There is a caption underneath each picture.
  
• Another wall contains the addresses of and directions to everybody we know and other houses we like.
  
• All paintings look like 3rd grade art projects.
  
• Everytime something inside or outside of the house is changed, a signed in the corner is updated: "This house was modified on May 19, 2004."
  
• There are advertisements, catalogs, and flyers all over the place because anytime someone orders something the homeowner gets .001% of your purchase.
  
• When you ask a resident of the house a question they respond by yelling, "JAVASCRIPT ERROR!" and force you to leave the house, watch the presentation, and come back in.